“It’s not what you look at that matters; it’s what you see,” Henry David Thoreau once mused. Kathryn Eriksen’s journey is a vivid testament to the profound truth of this statement, as she discovered that the stories we tell ourselves shape our perception of the world and, ultimately, our lives.
Eriksen’s wake – up call came at the age of fifty – five. Overnight, it seemed, new wrinkles, deeper crow’s feet, dry eyes, and parched skin became her daily companions, greeting her in the mirror each morning. She found herself comparing her appearance to that of others her age, a habit that quickly spiraled into a cycle of doubt, comparison, and self – judgment. This negative train of thought didn’t just dampen her spirits; it cast a shadow over her entire life, plunging her into the depths of aging despair. Her age became a lens through which she viewed everything, and her mirror, once a simple reflection, transformed into her worst enemy. The more she invested in anti – aging products, the more she disliked herself, creating a self – fulfilling prophecy where she not only thought she looked old but also started acting the part.
It was through meditation that Eriksen finally saw the trap she had fallen into. She realized that she had the power to replace her limiting stories with positive, empowering ones. This realization led her to develop Story Alchemy™, a four – step process designed to transform negative narratives into tales of strength and possibility.
The first step, Realize, is about taking ownership. Recognizing that we, and we alone, are the authors of our stories is crucial. When we accept this truth, we reclaim the power to rewrite our narratives. It’s a moment of self – empowerment, where we acknowledge that we are not victims of our circumstances but the architects of our experiences.
Next comes Responsibility. Once we’ve admitted to creating our stories, we understand that we have a duty to change them if they’re holding us back. If a story keeps us from reaching our full potential, it’s time to make a conscious decision to pen a new chapter.
The Reframe step is where the magic truly happens. It’s about looking at situations or people from a fresh perspective, uncovering aspects that we previously overlooked. Every situation, no matter how dire, can be reframed positively. Even the fact that we’ve survived to tell the tale is something to celebrate. It’s a creative process, like painting a new picture on a canvas that was once filled with darkness.
The final step, Release, is about forgiving ourselves for the limiting stories we’ve carried. By showing kindness and compassion to ourselves, we free ourselves from the past and give ourselves permission to embrace the new, empowering story. The old narrative has served its purpose, and now it’s time to let it go.
Eriksen applied Story Alchemy™ to her own perception of aging. She realized that she had bought into society’s definition of age and decided to create her own. Now, when asked about her age, she replies with a twinkle in her eye that “I am as old as I think I am. Today, I think I am in the mid – forties.” This simple shift in mindset not only brought her joy but also changed the way she saw herself. She no longer felt bound by a number but instead embraced the fluidity of her self – perception.
Age is just one area where limiting stories can take root. Money, relationships, and career are also common breeding grounds for such narratives. For instance, if you’re struggling in relationships or have a history of what you consider “failed” ones, you can use Story Alchemy™ to dig deeper. By asking yourself questions like why a relationship ended, what the other person thought, and what limiting story you’ve been carrying, you can uncover patterns. These patterns can then be reframed, turning past hurts into lessons and obstacles into opportunities.
The stories we tell ourselves act as filters for our reality. If we believe we’re incapable of forming new relationships because we’re too sensitive, or that we’re too old to learn a new career, or that money defines our worth, we limit ourselves. But when we transform these limiting stories, our entire perspective shifts. Our sensitivity becomes a strength in relationships, our life experience is an asset in our career, and money is seen as a simple exchange of value.
As we embrace our new, empowering stories, we’ll notice changes in our relationships, actions, and even our sense of self. We may rediscover parts of our authenticity that we had long forgotten, finding ourselves laughing more, being more playful, and seeing the world with fresh eyes. The end result is a harmonious alignment between our mind and our perception, where moments of happiness and joy spontaneously bloom. So, dare to embark on the journey of Story Alchemy™, and watch as your life transforms from a tale of limitation into an epic story of empowerment.
